Hard work.

14th January, 2023.

I want to try to capture those feelings and thoughts which are not often captured.

Less over-intellecutalising, more capturing the essence of state. Emotional state, thoughtfullness, consideration of those intuitive experiences we spend so much time trying to fold and convey in the clumsy, communicative phenomeonon known as ‘words’.

I’m sure so many have felt like this. Felt the present world and their interpretation of reality in front of them — felt the urge to paint the picture through symbols.

But fuck. What a task.

8am to 7pm — moving house.

My wife is amazing. Really — I don’t give her enough credit nor gratitude for that matter. But her attitude to a task like packing up a house — no joke.

In her own words, “I set my mind to a task and I just focus on completing that task”. She really does, so I felt obliged to adopt a similar mind-set. And I have to say, there’s something satisfying to “being on a mission”.

But gee-whiz there’s still a smattering, a collection of boxes and random objects strewn through-out the property. Good thing we don’t own it…that would be a whole other story.

The final two weeks we spend at my mother’s house; the three of us — Margot, Darius and myself.

I appreciate the novelty of all of this — the change in scenery, location of living. Having travelled before and learnt to become comfortable in places that don’t naturally feel very comfortable…it’s a skill. Or perhaps just experience makes me feel more…accepting of it all.

Today wasn’t anything too special — hours of work spent with my wife working on migration; processing visas, reading and answering emails, conversing with schools we might strike partnership agreements with so as to gain commission from international students seeking further education in Australia.

I need to remind myself of the nuance of the work. How we change peoples’ lives through the processess we endure working with the Department of Home Affairs. The administrative-nature of the work can overshadow the significance of what we do, but doesn’t happen with everyone?

At least tomorrow I have a reason to go driving around — mobile massage; as an accredited Osteopath I’m using the work as a vehicle to practise treating bodies. Developing my ‘therapeutic intuition’. Then back to St.Kilda for the afternoon, training myself, taking a class of lifting, training someone after that before finishing with an hour or two of ‘hard rubbish’ organising back at the Glen Iris house.

Hectic when I read that back. On a mission, just like my wife.

Life is a blur at the moment and my mental state feels it. This, however, is what I signed up for.

I don’t say we’re “hectic” for no reason. Because, well, we’re hectic.

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